Infertility and cake...

So a little catch up on the big "I" (infertility).  So this past month I have been doing IUI treatment. If you want to know more about IUI go here. But I have mentioned before that I have to give myself shots every night and go to Vegas every 3 days. Well that was going GREAT until our last appt when it was to decide when to do the actual procedure. I got a phone call that day saying we are going to have to cancel this cycle of IUI because there are too many eggs I have developed and they dont want to risk me having "9 babies" as what the NP told me over the phone. It wasnt a matter of "if" i got pregnant, but "how many". There was just to great of risk with how many eggs I had produced. So I was really bummed out, yet grateful that the medicine actually worked, it just worked a little too well! So I was disappointed because I didnt want to have keep doing this over and over again. It is very expensive to drive to Vegas every 3 days, pay for the medicine, take my child who seems to need every type of attention possible while I am driving and cant help her, give myself shots every night, not to mention the mental stress of infertility. Also did I mention we drive a whopping 4 hours all for about 10 minutes TOPS in the Dr office?! So anyway, I was put out, yet grateful (that doesnt make sense, i know). Now we have to start all over. Luckily we dont have to pay again (only for meds). But as I was talking to the nurse last night to schedule my appt for today I asked "just how many eggs did i produce?" and she counted, and counted and finally she said "21!". Twenty-one eggs people!!! Holy smokes! Again with the whole grateful thing. Could you imagine if I got pregnant?! I was thinking it was only 9 egg, since the nurse told me they dont want me to have 9 babies, but no, 21. I guess that is 21 less "crimson tides" that I dont have to surf in the future ;) Ok that was TMI but Im trying to look at the positive here folks!

So now I am back at it starting today. Sigh.......

I cant believe it is almost July. I love July. Living in Utah and being LDS we have 2 holidays to celebrate. AWESOME! Nothing says "American" like celebrating your country and religion and the freedom we have like the month of July. I am entering a cake decorating contest in Hurricane so I am racking my brain to come up with the most awesome looking and tasting cake there. Heaven only knows we need the cash prize AND to get my name and business out there to lots of people. I also just ordered business cards. That is weird to think I actually have a business card. I feel official.

Also one last thing. I dont think I put a pic up of my latest creation. It was for a friend who had a mission farewell party. He is going to the Ukraine and I was asked to to a cake for him. It was chocolate cake with a peanut butter mousse filling. This is the design I came up with...

F*R*I*E*N*D*S

So Ty and I were playing our usual game of Phase 10 (other times its Skipbo) and we were discussing how Ty would REALLY love to some day go back and work at a University. Ideally for him it would be BYU. Then we got talking about how we dont really feel at home here in St George yet and how we really miss Utah County. Then we got talking about maybe its because we are still new here and just need time to adjust and make friends. That last part, the one about making friends, thats where we fall short... See Ty and I are pretty sociable people. Probably more so Ty than me, but still we love the idea of having great friends around that you can hang out with at a moments notice. Is that hard to come by? Honestly, I dont know the answer to that. I have been SSSOOO lucky to have life-long friends around (and other great friends we have made along the way) that we have always had access too. If we were bored one night we could always call up someone and have a fun plan. Is that a rare thing that I have taken advantage of my whole life? Either that OR what worries us is that people think we are
A) weird
B) unfriendly; or
C) all of the above

Are we weird? Do people see us and say "oh they look nice" and then talk to us and say "oh... they are... different." Hmmm. There is some food for thought. Is there a reason we dont have any friends? We boggled over this question for some time. But to our credit we have noticed people keep to themselves a lot more here. We still dont know the majority of our neighbors and have probably only actually SEEN them a hand full of times, if ever at all. And in our ward we dont really fit in either. There is probably only a small hand full of people our age, and most of them have multiple kids they are busy with and have callings in the primary so we have only seen them in sacrament.... If it werent for our fearless attention-seeking child, we literally would know no one! So to all our friends scattered all over, how do you meet new friends when you move?

Splish Splash

Its officially getting hot down here. I think our days of double digit temperatures are gone for the time being. Its actually not as bad as I anticipated. Granted it isnt quite 110 on a regular basis yet, but being inside in air conditioned places or cars of course is the key. Friday I was in Vegas and at noon (nevada time) it was already 111, and thats not even the heat of the day! Yowzah!

Yesterday we took lucy to a Splash Festival in Washington and she had a blast! It is such a nice rec center and the pool opens up to the outdoors and has a lazy river and a water slide that is half indoors half out, plus lots of kid play areas/slides. They also had music and a surprisingly good band playing while Iron Man, pirates and mermaids graces us with their nautical presence. Lucy loved seeing "Ariel" and her friend (the other mermaid) and was quick to dismiss Ty and I so we wouldnt cramp her style and embarrass her in front of the famous mermaids. It was funny we took her over there and she turns around and said "Get out" (she is very tactful) and pushes us away. So now it starts. I didnt think she would be embarrassed of us until at least 10!

I have been super busy lately having to travel to Vegas every few days for fertility treatments. I have to take Lucy with me because I dont have anyone to watch her for hours every 3 days. Its not bad its just hard because she gets so restless sitting in the car. We travel the 2 hours just to be in the Dr office for  a whopping 10 minutes tops and then we are back on the road, so she doesnt get much of a break. so we are in the process of IUI right at the moment and they have to check up on me so often so that they are certain they get the results they want and make sure its not working TOO much, also the medicine I have to use has some nasty side effects that could potentially happen if they dont keep an eye on me. I am grateful for them taking such concern and it is very important, especially to get multiple eggs ready (therefore a better chance of conceiving). So i am very glad that they are really on top of things. Its just hard traveling so much, with a baby, on a car that has well over 111,000 miles on it. I just happened to stumble across a blog of a couple in Texas that went through the same procedure as me and had 3 eggs developed, just like my Dr is hoping for, and this couple wound up with quintuplets! WHAT! Talk about freaked me out! We are praying for one, possibly two, but 5!? I would cry for a while I think. Wish us luck!

Tonight before bed I asked Lucy if she wanted me to have a baby so that she would have a brother or sister and she said "Ummmm, no. Wucy pony?, No baby". Meaning, she asked if she could get a pony and has no interest in a sibling. So thats good to know.

This week I have a cake order and I am super excited. This is for a mission farewell party and there will be TONS of St. Georgians there to gain potential clients from.

Life inside the mind of Jody

So what is roaming around inside my brain today? Your probably scared to know. I would be too. But I shall tell you all.

Lucy vs. Friends: This has been on my mind today quite a bit. So i mentioned in a previous post that there are about 1 million little boys running around here, and no little girls, except mine. Which is fine. All of these little boys are older than her as well. Today there was about 6 or so of them outside our house trying to catch our neighbors poor little cat (well its actually quite a fatty but thats besides the point) and they were running around with no shoes on in the street and getting all dirty like little kids do. But the problem is Lucy was doing or trying to do EVERYTHING these little boys were doing. I tried to make her stay on the sidewalk, stay where I could see here, and to not crawl under cars. Of course Lucy being Lucy, listening isnt a strong point and defiance is. So I had a hard time reigning her in. Well some of the older boys (who were brothers) were talking to each other and said in a very mean way to each other "You are so stupid, your such a butt head" and "your so dumb get away from me". And some of the other boys werent very nice either, in a bad example sort of way. Soooo moral of the story is, people scare me. Lucy scares me. I cant control everything and I am scared for the example and impression people will leave on my children. How do you control who your children hang out with, without being rude or judgmental? Especially trying to explain to my children why I dont want them to play with little Suzy or Johnny especially when they cant understand the problem. I guess really the only thing I can do is pray really really really hard, and second teach my kids appropriate behavior and the rules we have for them and hope they make good choice and influence others for good. But thats the part that scares me, especially if my children are anything like me, which Lucy is 110% like me. Sigh...

Polygamy: So we discovered this show on discovery channel called Polygamy USA. Totally fascinating. Having grown up near and now living so near Polygamist groups I have always been so fascinated by their culture. Mainly because I dont know anything about them really and their religion is a lot of ways so close to mine, yet so different. I see folks from Colorado City and Centenial Park all the time around town and I want to so badly just go and ask so many questions I have, or be a fly on the wall in one of their homes or churches. Kind of a cool show to watch and just learn (hopefully its accurate).

Cakes: Last night I made some fondant to practice with today. I used about a gallon of food coloring and it took FOREVER to get the shade of Navy that I wanted. My hands were dead from kneading it. Today I went to cover my fake cake and the stupid stuff wont work. I realized I forgot to put water in with the recipe and now its too late and completely ruined. I was/am so mad about this. I hate wasting, its sort of a pet peeve of mine, and I wasted all that fondant, food coloring, time, and energy all for nothing... Boo. But I guess I did learn some things so i cant complain too much.

Neighbors: Ty and I are beyond house hungry. We have been dying to get into a home for probably the last year or so. I doesnt help when my favorite channel on tv is HGTV and ALL of our friends are home owners. It also doesnt help when we move in to a cute little neighborhood of townhomes and the unit next door in empty and then all of a sudden a bunch of teenage boys move in and blast their electric guitars and video games! I feel like such an old lady saying that. Cant you just picture me walking outside my door in a robe and curlers shaking my fist saying "you young whipper-snappers, turn down that ruckus before I come over there and turn it down for you"!

Last but not least, BUGS: I hate cockroaches. Hate them. There was a GIANT one this morning on its back by the door. Luckily I clobbered the bugger but still, the thing was like 2 inches long!! Of course hot places are usually infested with them, and St George is no exception. UGH! I can handle spiders, I can handle ants, but I cannot handle roaches!!!

Catch up and stuff

I really need to keep up on the blog. I have so much to blog about. Nothing super cool, but stuff I want to document none the less. But where do I even start?

Mothers day: This day was of course special and I was spoiled. We have church at 9 so i didnt get to sleep in BUT I was woken with breakfast in bed! Yummy french toast muffins, eggs, and a piece of bacon and a few magazines. It was so good. Lucy kept telling me Happy Birthday. Then Ty cooked dinner, he made kebabs with rice and rolls. Then for dessert I made texas sheet cake (one of my FAVS!) It was great. Also a great day to reflect on all the mom's in my life and how they have impacted me and made me a better person.

Lucy: Lots going on with this little girl. We got her all signed up for preschool (that was awhile ago) but all her testing was done. She is "moderately delayed" in her speech and she was tested for behavior and she is "slightly delayed" in that as well. Even though they dont do any diagnostics they said per the test results she has tendencies for ADD and something else I cant remember at the moment. It doesnt mean she HAS these things, just means she has a few characteristics that coincide with this. The funny thing is we KNOW she has a speech problem, thats obvious but when she was tested at the end of her speech therapy in Provo they said she was now normal. NO WAY!! The guy that did the testing here sat with her for 5 min and new she needed help. Just goes to show that parents inclination sometimes overrule "professional" opinion. So she has the summer off, no therapy, but when school starts up she will start. She will be in a class with kids just like her as well kids that have no delays at all with a teacher that is specific for this kind of structure, plus there are aids and people that will help. I am so happy with this and we hope this will catch her up to speed quickly.
 As far as behavioral, I thought I was just being super paranoid and sensitive to her behavior and she didnt have any problems, I was the one with the problem. I always felt like the worst parent when I would explain Lucy's "spirited" behavior to people I would always get the feeling like people were thinking "well, she is 2. 2 year olds dont sit still, and they are hard..." kind of like I was over exaggerating and being a baby. I always just felt like nobody understood my feelings of how "difficult at times" she can be, my feelings were never validated and for SO long I felt like I was the WORST parent ever because everyone has kids that seem so calm and mindful and they listen somewhat. I felt like maybe its all my fault because Im not patient, I yell, and I get mad, and maybe im too hard on her, and she watches too much tv, and Im not one of those creative moms who make these activites that keep their child occupied for hours, and its hard for me to be patient and play with her all day, and maybe im not made for parenthood, and on-lookers and people who dont live with her 24-7 make quick judgements and it of course reflects on my parenting.... And so on and so forth.  These thoughts go through my mind a lot. Anyway as much as I hate the fact that she is "below normal" I feel like FINALLY somebody understands and I really am not crazy and a horrible person to think that I ave had a hard time with raising her. But most of all I am glad that now we can DO something about it rather than just get frustrated and mad at her. I still think that somehow these issues with her are my fault, I dont think I will ever not think that. But I am just so grateful for the technology and BRILLIANT people that help families like us.  Reading back over this paragraph it doesnt expain what I really feel, and mean, but I think you get the picture...

Royal Icing- we are just sitting a waiting. I have done everything that I need to do and now I just wait for the home inspection and then turn in my business application to the city and then do more waiting. I had my first client. Ty's boss's little girl had a party and they had me do a couple sheet cakes for the guests. I also have another order (if you can even count it, its from my MIL) for a missionary farewell in a few weeks. Other than that, I wonder sometimes what I have gotten myself into. Honestly I have no idea what I have gotten myself into. But I guess I will see!

Ty: Ty is just working, working, working! He works SO hard, and for that I am grateful. He does a great job and I am proud of him. He is also prepping for a bike race in a few weeks in Cedar. The other night he went out and about 10 min later in he walks covered in dirt, blood, and lots of scrapes and ripped up gear. He wrecked big time. Every time he goes out I get really paranoid, for this exact reason. He is honestly lucky he didnt break anything or chip his teeth! But he is doing much better and is still biking.

Me: I am doing great. This sunshine has worked miracles for me. Im not joking. Being cooped up inside all winter was not doing great things for me and it was really hard. But I feel great and I am just happy for new opportunities. Big and EXPENSIVE decisions have to be made really fast about what route we are going to take for our infertility journey. Ahhh, back to the grind of the infertility battle. It was SO nice to take off the last 5 months and not even think about it, but with the hormone treatment completely worn off, we can now get back to the stress of it all. We are now working with Red Rock Fertility in Vegas (that is the closest fertility center to us). Wish us luck, and a lot of prayers. We need a miracle...

This post is forever long So i will cut it short and add some pics.

Lucy's new bike for being potty trained!!!! I honestly and truly never thought this day would come.

The girls playing with the water table and Grandma and Grandpas house

Lucy's princess dress that she got for pooping in the potty. This was the BIGGEST hurdle of potty training

Kite festival. SO FUN!

The girls and uncle Andrew. He is SO good to play with them.

Almost here!

So for quite some time I have been wanting to open up my own cake design company from home. I looked into it in Provo but there was too much to do (even more than I realized at the time) without knowing where we would be moving. So when we came to St George and I looked at our kitchen space I thought, maybe I should wait until we get into a house to start it up. We have about 3 sq ft of counter space and I knew I would go crazy trying to bake and decorate with such small space. Well it wasnt long after that that I just KNEW i had to start on the business process. I honestly felt/feel like im being shoved into this, its really weird! There are so many hesitations that I have and the process is daunting, long, in-depth, and overwhelming. But for some reason everytime I have a hesitation it either works out all on its own somehow or I get this surge (shove) of "YOU HAVE TO DO THIS!" and the process all of a sudden feels easier. I cant explain it other than maybe its the Lords way of telling me (this is how He usually does it) that this is where I need to go. I dont feel ready, prepared, or talented enough. But oh well, i guess its going to happen whether I like it or not!

SO... We are almost there! The other day I was reading over the requirements to pass the health inspection and there were things I was NOT ready for and I thought for sure that this process has come to a screeching halt and who knows when I will ever open a business up. I found that I have to have a separate fridge and shelving/storage for my cake stuff. I cant use our fridge or storage that has our personal food/stuff in it... Uh, I have to get another fridge? Ya right. Well of course after conversing one night with the Man Upstairs about this slight problem I thought "I think I really will have to just put this on hold".

Rewind a little over a month. Our renter had told us before we moved that we are going to have to bring our own fridge. Luckily my in-laws are the bomb and let us take whatever we wanted out of our old place to take with us, and that included our fridge. We got down here and annoyingly (or so we thought) there was already a fridge here! How inconsiderate! What are we going to do with an extra fridge. Bryce (Ty's bro) took it and thought they could use it at his office. But i had the feeling last night that we needed to call him and just ask to see if they really are using it or what not. Well turns out he is giving it back to us! Talk about MAJOR hurdle just cleared!!! Again, weird, and miraculous.

Without further ado. Here is my darling logo (thank you 48hourslogo.com!) and business name! Even if I feel all of these hesitations I could not be more blessed. Everything is falling PERFECTLY in to place by miracle. I cant wait!

I better watch my mouth!

So recently, more than ever, I have noticed Lucy is copying a lot of phrases that I say. Most I am not proud of. She is too little to have this vocabulary! Here is just a few

-UGH!!! (this is when I am slightly frustrated or bugged and I will do this grunting UGH sound. Lucy does this ALL the time now)

-Oh my gosh (even though we can still hardly understand a lot of what she says, this one came out clear as day. We tell her not to say it. But when I say it all the time and I dont realize, it makes it a tough case to sell)

-Crap! (this one came out last night after Tyler said it. She thought it was funny and kept saying it over. But at least this time it wasnt from me, whew!)

-Just a minute (she says this over everything. Again I say this to her all the time)

-I am spank you bum "im going to spank your bum" (When it is the last straw, we do in fact give her a little spanking, so sue us! Its not all the time but when she deliberately does something naughty when we REPEATEDLY tell her not to and looks us right in the eye and shoves it in our face, like biting people for example, she will get a spanking for it)

-she still calls me "Jod" all the time. Even though I tell her my name is mommy, I cant help but think this is so funny! Its the way she says it that cracks me up. And unlike a lot of things, is completely innocent!

My lucy bear is a crack up! But saying "crap" and "oh my gosh" makes me realize that I really need to watch myself in life and make sure I am doing/saying things that if she repeats, I am happy about. Even though they arent bad words or anything, I still dont like her saying it.