Oh my little child. My little, little, naughty, gross, beautiful girl. You sure have done it this time! Wow. Just wow. I am speechless actually.
Ok here is the story. Tyler and I were watching a movie tonight and our little, dear, sweet child was all up in our grill. We descided "hey, we NEVER get to spend time together, just us, so lets put her in our room and turn on a movie". I know, we are great parents. So there she goes, in to watch her favorite show as of late, Beauty and the Beast. We saunter on back every so often to check up on her and see if she needs anything or what not. So our movie ends and I go back to check on her and as soon as I walked into the room I noticed she had something in her fingers. Something small, round, and... brown. I also noticed her hand was coming from her diaper... I ran over to her, praying that the obvious was just a vicious trick played on my mind, but no, nope, no tricks here in the King home, no tricks, just a bunch of little turd-letts scattered strategically across our beautiful, freshly clean bed. I dont remember the words or the decibel level that came out of my mouth, but Ty came running. I just remember the words "GROSS", "Lucy, dont ever do that again!" and "GROSS" and "Lucy that is cah-cah (yes i use baby words, sue me)" and "GROSS". Did i mention how gross? Thank HEAVEN that it was in little pebbles and not schmere stuff. THANK HEAVENS!!! I can tell you one thing. And please fast forward if you are sensitive, but I know my child, and if there is one thing I know, Lucy STILL puts things in her mouth... EWE, gross, EEEEWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEE, ewe, ewe, gross, BLAH, I CANT GET THAT IMAGE OUT OF MY BRAIN!!! And now neither can you. Sorry. But I DID warn you. To say the least her hands were scrubbed and her teeth are more clean then they ever have been. Oh my dear child, my curious, curious child. Why do you hate us?!
1 month ago